Thursday, January 19, 2012

Biscuit without Biscuits: Semi-Vegetarian Paleo Diet Adventure Part 3

Did a little Research at the CA Academy of Sciences last weekend
Day 11 of the Paleo experiment.

I had a really long weekend since HB was in town. I took Thursday/Friday off and spent two nights up at the cabin, then returned to SF to spend the weekend with BF and his visiting best friend from college. I was compliant with the diet thanks to HB and her wonderful jesus centaur BF, who happily cooked me eggs and fish and broccoli no less than 6 times in 2 days. They also slipped me some bacon. It was fucking delicious. I did cheat on Saturday with a single corn tortilla and rice with my Indian food. Also the 7 bottles of wine over the 6 day weekend.

I’m still struggling with the vegetarianism issue. It’s become such an identity for me that despite my intense cravings for animal, I am also feeling intensely guilty. I had an affair with bacon, I dabbled in a small serving of chicken, and snuck a steak bite at a winery over the weekend. Our nutritionist sent me an article today that does make me feel a bit better, but I still feel like I’m doing something terrible every time I put a bit of meat in my mouth (my brain just started screaming “that’s what she said”).

Our group of four met with our Nutritionist last night at Whole Foods for an update and a guide through the store for her favorite products. She explained to us a lot about the proper way to raise meat, why we shouldn’t eat processed and sugary foods, and why certain health buzz words (like ‘vegetarian fed chicken’) are total bullshit. I agreed with all of what she had to say. However, by the end of the tour I was tempted to go rogue, run screaming to the bakery and cheese department to rebelliously stuff my face with my old forbidden loves. She caught me starting forlornly at the Tomme Dolce and Mt. Tam.

Despite my inner voice screaming “eat the cheese!,” I did manage to be productive and assemble the strangest grocery purchase of all time, including: coconut butter, sauerkraut, fish sauce, horseradish mustard, jicama, coconut aminos, and a spicy kombucha-like drink made from yellow peppers, squash, and live bacteria. Mmmm. BF came home to me eating mashed avocado out of a bowl with rotted-ass flavored flax crackers. If he thought I ate weird things before… he had no idea what was in store for him.

I have been making progress – my stomach isn’t as bloated, and I think, though I could be imagining it, that my keratosis pilaris arm rash is clearing up. If you aren’t familiar with this condition, it’s something I call “white people rash” on the upper arms. It’s red, bumpy, and VERY attractive. I’ve had it since I was about 13 and it’s been getting a lot worse in the last few years. I have also lost about 6 pounds since we started. I think that’s quite good, considering that we had visitors for a full week and I was completely out of my routine.

I’m still cynical, but will stick with this until the end of the month to decide if I want to keep going.

In other news:

- I have gone 3 nights without wine! This is an accomplishment, and I plan on breaking that streak tonight, since it’s BF’s day off and we have a wine bar tradition to uphold.

- For the first time since I was staffed in Wichita for 7 weeks and ate Subway at least 10 times/work week, the fresh bread smell wafting from Subways smells absolutely delicious.

- Nutrition lady is telling me that I shouldn’t work out so much, and I honestly just don’t know how I feel about that. Call me weird, but I like working out. It makes me feel sane and it's my thinking time. Maybe I'll cut down a little - but I'm undecided on that issue.

- I’m wondering if I’m bean intolerant. My bean consumption has definitely skyrocketed in the time that the uncontrollable weight gain commenced. It’s the only change to my diet that I’ve never tried before, and low-carb has never before worked for me.

- George Michael is really enjoying this diet, as he gets to eat sweet potatoes with butter from my plate almost every night. I haven’t yet adjusted to the fact that high protein portions can be smaller than my 100 bite vegetarian meals.

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