Friday, March 30, 2012

Happy Friday!

You may have heard, there was a dance number on the season premiere of Mad Men.

In my opinion, the imitators were much more entertaining.

Happy Friday ya'll!

Thursday, March 29, 2012

This Wedding of Terrors is Dedicated to Holar

My favorite way to pass time at work since getting engaged is watching wedding videos. And when I'm REALLY committed to procrastinating I'll just find the vimeo channel of the videographer and sit through all of their greatest hits. Today I found this channel by Inkspot Productions (really very good at their job), where, among other things, I found a wedding that must have cost at least a million dollars (just wait for the send off), amazingly southern wedding hair, and, perhaps most importantly, a wedding incorporating Holar's worst nightmares and fear of birds into the ceremony. Holar: this one goes out to you.




I need to find a park with swings, stat

Hey Hola B, check out this video, especially the 1:04 mark. I didn't know Fred Sanford was a movie star!?

 

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

I love Figs

You know I love a gif. Or a fig, which is what I always type when I try to type gif. So figs, I love them. And friend to the Ladies Bits, Scribe/CW pointed me to this awesome website, what should we call me, which promptly ate 4 hours of my life. Girlfriend takes funny gifs and titles them appropriately. Simple concept- excellent execution.

You may also know that reality tv gifs is one of my favorite time wasters. Obviously, because it combines two of my passions: reality TV and figs. So, I wanted to play the WSWCM game with reality tv gifs and current events in my life. Here goes.

When my border-violating desk-mate talks. Or uses her mouse at a 90 degree angle from her body.

Friday, March 23, 2012

Happy Friday!

Hey y'all, it's Friday! And it's the day of the Hunger Games. I CAN'T WAIT!

See you Monday!

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Biscuit Plans a Wedding: Best Internets Finds

Ever since I started planning this thing, I have applied my internet and celebrity gossip diligence to wedding blogs. Meaning, I check for updates multiple times a day. And when I find a blog I like, I will scroll through the whole archive, even if it takes hours. I have found tons of great ideas for the wedding - lots of fun and easy-to-make decorations, and tips for saving money.

I have also found some completely bonkers, hilarious, and so bad it's amazing stuff. People taking themselves way too seriously. Heinous bridesmaid dresses. And of course, engagement sessions that take fromage to a new level of excellence. I care about you, our 12 loyal readers, so I wanted to share my best wedding finds with you. Enjoy!

1. The I think she thinks she's a model for Anthropologie engagement shoot: Hop on over to the Green Wedding Shoes blog and soak in the glory of Jacqueline and Kyle's Sausalito engagement shoot. This couple definitely wins the world record for taking themselves seriously. Bonus? They live in my city. I really hope I run into them someday, and that it takes me a while to place the face. I hope I've had a few glasses of cab before I finally place them, and then I hope I loudly "whisper" "there's the girl who reenacted the Kanye video where he falls in love with a Phoenix!"


Fiance's balls firmly in death grip
Just hanging out here at the beach with our old chandalier and cake stands. Sunday Funday!

Monday, March 19, 2012

Get out of here, Carl!




Are you guys watching the Walking Dead? It's not the best show of all time, but it is scary, entertaining, and regularly leads me to scream at my television, as any good thriller or horror movie should. If you are watching, you know that Carl is the worst, Lori is the most ineffective parent ever, and that Carl is always showing up where he should not be. Someone else agrees, and created Get out of Here Carl! - a tribute to Carl being the worst. Enjoy.

I just felt like we could all use a high five today

I effing hate Mondays.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Happy Friday!

So I know we've been a bit light lately, and that's mainly because I've actually been forced to produce work lately. No worries, I'm sure that'll change soon.

This week's Friday dance goes out to my fiance' with the good hair and my mom, who was visiting all week. They know why. Enjoy the weekend everyone, and I hope you all catch a leprechaun or whatever it is you're supposed to do on St. Patrick's day.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Biscuit Plans a Wedding: The Dress


I tackled the thing I was most dreading this past weekend. I'm not sure if I'm an anomaly, but based on my encyclopedic knowledge of Say Yes to the Dress, I would say that my dread regarding dress shopping was a bit out the ordinary. Starting Friday, I went to four separate stores in search of dress that didn't make me look like a whale, or an "albino parade float (in the words of HB)."

So, why was I dreading this, and was my fear well founded? I dreaded wedding dress shopping because the thought of stuffing my muffy tops into my finest spanx, a strapless bra, and bridesmaid gold heels, then standing vulnerably in a small dressing room with a perfect stranger, fighting off the back-sweats whille sausaging myself into sample sizes, followed by parading out in an unzipped, 50 pound dress to show my closest family (with a sprinkling of by-standing strangers) gave me the anxiety poos. Ironically, those of us most likely to be flashing said muffy tops and strapless bra backs (always sexy) because we don't fit in the sample sizes are likely the same women that are least excited about the whole experience. On top of it all, I am neither a "naked" person, nor an attention whore, so yes, I was terrified. And this fear was well founded.

I started at J Crew Friday evening, moved on to Nordstrom and a designer/custom place on Saturday, and then tried out a mainly-bridesmaid store on Sunday. Each day and appointment included a different group of people I trusted. My dear friend and coworker accompanied me to J Crew, where I was actually smiling and quite comfortable because a) my sales lady let me stay in the dressing room alone to get in and out of dresses, and b) the bridal area was a pair of dressing rooms behind a curtain, shielded from the rest of the store and stranger eyes. These two things went a long way in helping me stay comfortable and non-sweaty. I can't reveal too much here, in this public place, but I can say that I think I found my dress at J Crew. Coincidence?

Friday, March 9, 2012

Happy Friday!





I have four appointments for wedding dress try-ons this weekend, starting today. This is sort of a nightmare for me - putting on sample-size dresses and being forced to walk out in front of people for appraisal. Wish me luck and diminished bloating.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Today in unfortunate "targeted" advertising...

1. I know this was totally unintentional, but, ummm...? I also know that ad sense and the like can make some pretty awesome associations, kind of like our banner ads for Panamanian mail order brides. Google geniuses, can't you fix this?

2. Does anyone still watch the Real World? I love reality television, but I will only watch this franchise when I'm too lazy or hungover to retrieve the remote from the other side of the bed.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

"French Government official publicly refers to females as 'human beings'. " - Pack up your vaginas ladies, France it is.

Hey Ladies,

  Have you been feeling "less than fresh" lately? Perhaps you've noticed some irritation in your lady parts? Yeah me too. Which Summer's Eve product is supposed to get rid of the of politicos invading our vaginas?

I can't think about any of this too much and maintain my nonchalant humorous take on life, so I will make this short.  Jezebel posted this article about France banning child beauty pageants After my initial visceral reaction to thought of French people missing out on Toddlers and Tiara's, I was struck by this quote:

"The senator who wrote the report, Chantal Jouanno, has said that the sexualization of young girls is "contrary to the dignity of the human being" and is a step backward for gender equality."

This is a politician speaking. About lady children. Using the words human and dignity.

Refreshing to say the least.  If I continue having to watch these dudes



 tell me how to use my vagina and about which civil liberties/basic human rights I will be losing this week, I will have to pack my vagina and all of my other ladies bits and go on a long vacation. Call me when they pass a constitutional amendment that in order to make policy governing my vagina you must be able to locate a vagina on a map of an adult woman.  Seriously, look at these guys.

-HB

Paleo Adventure + Hunger Games


Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Still totally, butt crazy in love with Josh



Hey bitches, I'm posting from home because I couldn't watch this video at work. Which was torture, because it was like "7 minutes in heaven with your favorite man other than Jon Hamm and your fiance'!" Psych! Video not available. ROUGH. So, I rushed home and watched it. Now that I've shared it with you, I'm going to watch it again. And again.

Monday, March 5, 2012

RHoD


This sketch is pure genius. Ms Wiig's Cinder-Kim-Richards impression steals the show.

Friday, March 2, 2012

It's raining tennis balls



I'm going to pin this to a Pinterest board with the comment "great idea for my dog's birthday!"

Happy Friday!

It's been a while since we paid homage to Mac's dance skillz, and I just felt like it was time.