Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Biscuit Without Biscuits: Paleo Diet Adventure Part 5

Ten days to go.

I'm still not sold on this whole Paleo thing. Yes, my stomach is 100% less bloated. I have been sleeping like a rock (or like a caveman in my cave, as it were). And I think I'm looking slimmer. As an aside, does anyone else have a condition in which they lose two pounds and think they're suddenly Giselle?  I'll consider myself blessed that at times I completely irrationally think I'm as good looking as Beyonce, but what the shit.  My mind is a strange place.

But here's the thing: I haven't lost much weight. The universe was preventing me from weighing myself, as I bought replacement batteries for my first scale, which still did not bring the scale back to life. So, fine, it's at the end of it's 15 year life (guestimation - I have no idea where that scale came from, but I inherited it somehow). So, I went to Target over the weekend to buy a new scale, and I managed to buy a lemon. That scale will not turn on, regardless of the 3 batteries we tried. So, I finally gave in and weighed myself Monday at my exercise studio. I GAINED a pound!  Sure, it was the day after celebrating my engagement with lots of bubbly and a small cheat (I had a sugary cocktail and one onion ring). But seriously? Other than my cheat, no bread, beans, adding meat, and no sugar for almost 3 weeks, and this small of a result? Not cool. And my awesome arm rash looks better some days, not better on others. The results are not consistent!

Maybe I'm taking it overboard with the fats. Back when I tried the 4 hour body diet (similar to Paleo but with beans at every meal, and a cheat day once a week), I was so good at cheat days that I didn't lose any weight. Where other people lose their taste for desserts, or can only eat so much cheese, I'm insatiable. I'm a cheese machine. So, maybe it's too much butter and coconut oil that's preventing me from seeing better results. I have no idea.

But now it's business time, because I sure as hell am not getting married in this condition. So, for the next ten days I'm going to quit cutting any corners. I'll cut back on butter. I'm going to attempt to cut back on coffee intake, and keep the half and half out when I have it. ONE small piece of fruit per day, no parm on my eggs with marinara. Also, less bacon. I'll let you know how it goes.

Random fun fact:

- Ways I trick myself into thinking I've lost weight: Wear my jeans for a few days in a row without washing. They are totally looser, I must have lost 10 pounds. Only looking at myself in profile in the mirror. Staring at myself in the skinny mirror in my exercise studio. Wearing only elastic waistbands for the entire weekend.

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