Thursday, February 9, 2012

Biscuit Plans a Wedding: Part 2

The scene of the future crime: we're like Minority Report over here.
Something strange is happening to me. I'm crying happy tears about 4 times a day. I mean, I have always been a wedding crier. I cry when I watch 4 Weddings, for god sake. But now, literally every detail of this wedding, when I imagine it in place the day of, is making my eyes well up with tears.

For example: I just listened to a potential DJ's sample mix of 90s-2000s R&B and rap, and cried. It was just so perfect. And the thought of all my best friends and family from the many different parts of my life being in once place, dancing together, and hopefully having a grand old time was just too much for me. Then I realized that I was on the verge of crying tears of joy to a soundrack of Ms. New Booty. Not normal. On the train yesterday I was reading a post  on a practical wedding (my new favorite) about writing our own vows, and I thought about what I'd say to my mister, and I started crying. I feel insane. What is happening to me?

I think that, despite the fact that I never admitted it to myself or anyone else, I have really wanted to marry sir shiny hair for a long time. And I can barely write this without feeling like a total jerk-hole, but I am so overwhelmed by happiness and excitement right now that it's pouring out of me like lava. I feel like we have been pre-engaged for years, knowing that we wanted to build a life together, have cute babies, and laugh at our own jokes for the rest of our lives together. We couldn't manage an engagement or a wedding for a long time, due to the economy, our employment and living circumstances, and the usual lists of reasons-not to.

Things still aren't perfect, but I'm glad that we are biting the bullet and living our life. We are ready, and now we are so excited. So, I apologize in advance for the shit-load of emotional and oozing with sweetness crap that you will probably hear coming from my mouth (keyboard) in the next 9 months. I'm sorry for being obnoxious. I'm going to use the temporary insanity plea, because I honestly don't know where this sentimentality is coming from.

I do promise a few things in the name of sanity, though. I will not cry over things, like monogrammed napkins or letter-press invitation "suites." I will plan a raging party, and the fun experience will be the most important consideration for the day. And I promise that I won't complain about wedding planning. Because it's a huge privilege to be able to do this in the first place, and it shouldn't be a chore.

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